FruitFlies & FagHags: My Straight Friends Love Affair

My Love Affair Straight Best Friends

Straight Boys are miss understood. I work as the only black person who is not a kitchen staff or runner at Beefcakes. I make a point of it in my show, not only as a politcal statement, but as proof of how my "coconut" generatational middle class family and Bishops then Pinelands education, affords me the bastion of being truelly non-racial, in thought, word, perception and reflection.

I work every week with beautiful straight young caucasian males at Beefcakes. The fact is, because they tell me and show it; I am loved by heterosexual males, honestly and not just homoerotically. I'm the sassy sister, the noble girlfriend potential, the butch gay guy, the ellusive black friend, the source of unashamed flattery and much ego boosting carnal worship. One forgets that Straight men never get this kind of attention from women. They are the purveyours of the chase, the pick upline and the pressure of "making the first move".

Us gay men take that pressure off, of being the hunter. We flatter them by making them "the hunted" "the prize". Through my experience straight men are more humbled by the attention and grow to truelly appreciate it from a friend who communicates it freely. This, I guess is the reason why I have so many straight friends. They trust that I am completely honest in my interaction with them, because I do not deny the immediate physical attraction. I relish in they discomfort of me saying it foremost and forthwrite. See men never are brought up to accept compliments for their beauty. Only the female form is socially acceptable as an object of beauty and lustful fantasy. The most beautiful man of 30yrs still relishes in the most infantile or base compliment like a an adolescent girl first discovering her womanhood, when woman at 12years old or girls in the township deflect it with a dismissive "Voestek".

Why? Because for women its a "fait d compli" one of the first lessons of being a woman "men will always call out at you, whistle at your ass and debase you as a sex object". And you as a respectable woman must always play elusive or hard to get. Funny how as a gay young man I found it as a source of power to be so singled out like a celebrity in front of paparazzi, by men. Even if the "wolf whistle"was just because I minced like Naomi Campbell on the catwalk. While my female relatives sensed and were taught to feart it, defuse it and see the words Ingozi, Gevaar, Danger of The allure. So when gorgeous straight men are at the brunt of this testosterone charged, proverbial "wolf whistling" its intriguiging, beguiling and stupifying for them. All of a sudden they are the object of pursuit and FHM, Playboy idolitry turned on its head in Attitude magazine, Playgirl, Cosmoplitan, and Heat magazine. They adore it, love it and most unexpectadetly they respect it, as truelly courageous, because it, the reaction, the honest lascivious heterosexual-like angst could most certainly be a fist in the face, for such audacitiy and egostical complicity. I guess thats why I have so many Straight friends. I attract strong indepentendly minded heterosexual females, who find no comraderie but jealousy and rivalry amongst their stereotypical, damsel in distress contemporaries. The heterosexual males are seduced by my blatently honest adoration, fierce defence of my masculinity, cruel wit and learned intelluctuality , obvious vulnerabitlity and willingness to be treated like a noble lady. Traits women under sociatal duress and conformity have to portray to convey the all knowing all powerful male as oppossed to the physically feeble and emotionally diabolical female. href="http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7M8UxZDk56o">

My Gay Straight men know that I am physically able to match them in physicality, competiveness, tenacity, ambition and verility. Yet, I am able to flip the script and use the stereotype of a "pansy" "queen" or "a girl" to flirt, coerse and humour with full authority, honesty and intergrity. I am playing with an open deck of cards, out of bounds, but ensuring that my opponent is fully aware of the game and he might actually have the upper hand. Simply put "CHICKS WITH DICKS" I am a sport loving, Muay Thai Kickboxing training, acrylic fake nail wearing, Drag Queen surrounded by intelligent, ball busting, virile women. And only I navigate this precipise because of my fearless love and respect for the world majority hetereosesexual pussy and dick and count them as my strongest allies in this world, as my friends. Therefore if you see me hanging out with some of the most gorgeous straight men, in the room, Beefcakes staff, Gorgeous Models, Sexy Media Professionals, Hot Sportsmen, Debonair Older Men and Inegenue YH&C twinks, remember: Odidi Mfenyana even as ODIDiva, is not a stereotype of gay but the home base of multilingual, multiracial, multicultural, multisexual and nonconformist eros, thelema, storge, philia and agape love. This blog post is dedicated to all those objects of my affection that I never had the balls to tell or act on my feelings, lust or affection. Know this; I held you in such esteem because of your willingness to love me, want me, and I hold you in the highest regard because you are still my loves of my life...secretly <</></> I'VE BEEN BIDING MY TIME, BEEN SO SUBTLY KIND, I GOT TO THINK SO SELFISHLY, 'COS YOU'RE THE FACE INSIDE OF ME. I'VE BEEN BIDING MY DAYS, U SEE EVIDENTLY IT PAYS, I'VE BEEN A FRIEND, WITH UNBIASED VIEWS, THEN SECRETLY LUST AFTER YOU. SO NOW HE'S GONE RUSTY YOU'RE BORED AND BEMUSED. YOU WANNA DO SOMEONE ELSE, SO YOU SHOULD BE BY YOURSELF, INSTEAD OF HERE WITH ME, SECRETLY. TRYING HARD TO THINK PURE, BLOODY HARD WHEN I'M RAW, YOU TALKING OUT SO SEXUALLY, 'BOUT BOYS 'N GIRLS AND YOUR FRIGGIN' DREAMS SO NOW YOU FEEL LUSTY, YOU'RE HOT AND CONFUSED, SO NOW YOU'VE BEEN BUSTED, YOU'RE CAUGHT FEELING USED. YOU HAD TO DO SOMEONE ELSE, YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN BY YOURSELF, INSTEAD OF HERE WITH ME, SECRETLY, SECRETLY. SKUNK ANANSIE May 1999 Post Orgasmic Chill (Cruel Intentions Soundtrack)